AND HERE WE FIND OURSELVES, AFTER ALL THIS TIME;;

[Theodore Remus Lupin]

Teddy had been back in England for just over two months at this point in time and so far, things had gone rather well. The first person he saw besides Hagrid upon taking his old job, was Claire Pierce. For some reason, he knew she would be the first to come find him, just so she could chew him out about leaving. Which was exactly what she had done. Though he knew she was still a little upset with him and he couldn't blame her, they talked for a while and actually, it kind of made him feel better. After all, he hadn't talked about back then since well... Back then. Over the course of the last couple months he had been getting used to having a daily routine for maybe the third time in his life, getting to know his students and trying to make amends with parts of the family he left behind. He invited his God-Father Harry and Ginny over to his new home for dinner one night to talk and so they could meet his two sons. He spoke to Lily briefly, as well as spent an afternoon at the pub with Sirius, who seemed to being doing rather well considering the hell he seemed to have been put through. When it came to Albus, he was far too busy being Minister of Magic to be able to get away, so the two of them were still trying to figure out a time to get together and catch up.

The only person he had not been able to bring himself to see so far, was one Victorie Weasley. He had done everything in his power, gotten himself dressed up and ready to go and knock on her door, his family had even given him the address and told him to go there or try to catch her at work. But he just couldn't get himself to go. They told him about what happened to her husband and for that he felt truly sorry for her. But that didn't mean she would ever forgive him for leaving like he had. For not having a clue when he might be back. Didn't mean that she still had feelings for him like he had for her. After all, she had been married, had a family. He had created a family, yes, but he denied ever getting married. He couldn't give his heart to some one else, from day one it always belonged to her. This was what kept him from seeing her now, just the fact that he was terrified to be turned down, to see the possible hatred she could have for him after all these years.

So he kept himself busy, any way he knew how. Making lesson plans, trying to gather up creatures to show the kids. Safer ones for the younger kids and more exciting ones for the older crews. On this particular weekend, he had been visiting one of his favorite places in the world, Argentina. He gathered up several creatures there that were injured after getting an owl from them earlier that day. When he asked if he could bring them back to the school while he took care of them and got them healthy again, and use them to teach his students, the people there were glad to oblige. Unfortunately though, the not sick mother of these poor creatures came back from a hunting trip and was not happy that Teddy was gathering up her babies. The creature had rather large claws and took a slash at Teddy's shoulder that went rather deep and bled a lot from the moment the claws sank into his skin. The other men around him helped him get the animal calmed down and managed to get her young ones somewhere that Teddy could take them without getting hurt again. Regardless how the mother felt, these creatures wouldn't make it without medical attention.

With that, shoulder still bleeding, Teddy got the creatures back to Hogwarts and settled in and starting to be taken care of. Hagrid had come by, excited to see them, and quickly pushed Teddy off to the Hospital Wing to have his shoulder looked at, insisting that he would watch the young critters in his absence. Once in the hospital wing, the nurse told him that she did not have ready the necessary supplies and potions to heal him up properly, generally all she has to work with is the flu. So with that, after much protesting from Teddy, he was sent off to St. Mungo's, where he was now waiting in a very plain white exam room, sitting there holding a towel to his shoulder to keep himself from losing more blood, praying to God that today wouldn't be the day that he ran into Torie. He just wasn't anywhere near mentally prepared for it yet, and then again, somehow, he just knew he couldn't get that lucky.

words, 825
tags, valval/torie!
notes, good enough, i suppose... :/

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[Victorie Arianne Beckett]

Things weren’t going how she thought they should lately. Victorie Beckett had lost her husband a couple years ago. He had been going after some member of a new group that was up to no good when he came in badly injured. Torie had been the healer assigned to him and for a moment she froze when she went into the room and saw that it was him. After she unfroze though she ran over to him and tried her best to save him. She failed though and he died right there in front of her. His last words to her were to tell the kids that he was sorry for leaving them and then he was gone. Torie became an emotional wreck after that not able to pull herself together. She had loved Michael and losing him was hard. She had never thought she could love anyone other than Teddy Lupin but she did.

She still loved Teddy though and Michael knew that. The only reason she dated Michael in the first place was because she couldn’t wait around for Teddy forever. She figured that if Teddy really did love her he would have come back and settled down with her. He didn’t though and she took that as he didn’t love her anymore. It broke her heart and Michael was there to pick up the pieces. Together they had a couple kids and she had been happy with Michael and the family she had created. Her parents loved Michael as well, really the whole family did. Her heart still longed for Teddy though throughout the years but Michael was okay with that for some reason and Torie took that as he truly did love her. Who else would have put up with that?

For a couple months Torie was an emotional mess. She wouldn’t leave the house or even the bed. One day though she just got her mess together and became Victorie again. Everyone was glad to have her back to her old self. She started going back to work and just living life. She wasn’t planning on ever being with anyone else again because she didn’t want to feel heartbreak ever again. She had thought about sending a letter to Teddy to see how he was doing but she couldn’t take it if he had found someone else and settled down, something he wouldn’t do with her. That would just be too much for her to handle. Since her kids was in school she spent most of her days working constantly only taking it easy during the holidays when her kids would come home.

Torie was currently had worked a twenty-four hour shift. She hadn’t gone home because so many people were coming in left and right. She couldn’t leave when it was so busy, plus a couple healers had to call into work sick so she was lending an extra hand. She didn’t mind working so much like this because it was a distraction of not having Michael in her life. She loved work for that. It was what kept her going when the kids weren’t home or her family was too busy to talk. She ran a hand through her long blond hair as she walked into an exam room and grabbed the chart without looking at it or the patient. When she did look up she didn’t expect to see the person who she saw sitting on the bed. She froze them staring at him not believing it.

Torie finally unfroze and went into healer mode seeing what was wrong. She didn’t say anything to him because she was too upset. She might start crying if she talked to him. She had missed him so much and she thought she would never see him again since he never came around anymore. She fixed him up and then cleaned the blood off of him. She wrapped his arm in bandages and then put his arm in a sling. She was almost finished and hadn’t said a word to him the entire time she fixed his arm. She didn’t know what to say to him at all. What should she say? Hey. Where have you been? That just wouldn’t do for the lack of time they hadn’t talked. That could be a start though. Her brain was having an internal conversation with itself trying to guess what he would say to whatever she said. She did wonder what he was doing here and what happened to his arm. Teddy was always doing stupid stunts that ended up getting him hurt. He was like her cousin Sirius in that way.

Words: 774
Tagged: Theodore Remus Lupin

[Theodore Remus Lupin]

The entire time he sat waiting, Teddy was thinking about what would happen if he did run into Torie. Most people in his situation would be more concerned about the slight light headedness from bleeding so much, or just about the gash in his arm in general. But that honestly didn't bother him at all. He would get patched up, go on his way and tomorrow, he would be working with his creatures, just like any other day. The thing on his mind, the only thing he could think of, was what would happen if Victorie saw him. He could change his appearance, but that would be childish. He couldn't avoid her forever, could he?

Just when that thought crossed his mind, she walked in the room, beautiful as ever. When she saw him, she stopped for a moment, he couldn't hear her breathing or see her move at all for a second, then she let out her breath and walked over and started to work on his shoulder. He winced once or twice at particularly painful moments, but observed her the entire time. Very professional, but never once did she utter a word. Complete silence filled the blank room, but he could read the look on her face. She wanted to say something, but it seemed she just didn't know what.

When she finished most of her work she pulled out a sling, at which he began to open his mouth and shake his head to tell her it was not necessesary, she ignored him and put it on him herself. She still knew him well enough to know that his stubbornness had not changed over the years. And they hadn't even spoken a word. Finally, he let out a huge sigh, and spoke. "So, not even a "any questions?" or "this is what you need to do"?" he asked her, starting off in the only way he knew how, by being a little bit of a smart ass, with his goofy grin rightly in place.

Though after that, the ever confident, joking and playful Lupin's smile faded and he looked away from her, unsure of what he had said now. He had once again, just gone with a gut feeling and said the first thing that popped into his head. She probably would roll her eyes at him, shake her head and walk away. Or maybe not, maybe it was just the ice breaker they needed. The same way he had always done things, spontanious and at the last second. All he could do now was hope that she would give him a chance. If for nothing else, than to apologize for the way everything happened, before he left her be if that was what she wanted him to do. If she chose that, after all, he couldn't exactly blame her.



word count, 475
tags, victorie!
notes, crappy post. sorry.

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[Victorie Arianne Beckett]

Tori didn’t know what to think seeing Teddy there. She hadn’t seen him in forever and the last time she had he had broken her heart. The memory of that came back to her. Tears tried to come forth but she didn’t let them. She couldn’t show any weakness in front of this man. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. Anger seethed through her as she did her work for the man. She stayed calm doing her work, making sure to give his dumb ass the same treatment as everyone else. Oh, how could she be so stupid before as to fall in love with him. The sad part of it was that she still loved Teddy. No matter how much she had grown to love Michael since they were together and married she still loved Teddy deep down.

Then his smart ass with his goofy grin had to say something. "So, not even a "any questions?" or "this is what you need to do"? She had her back to him at this point ready to walk out of the room. She knew he knew how to take care of it after that. She was ready to get out of there. Hell, she didn’t think he would keep the sling on his arm. She turned on her heels the rage showing on her face. After all these years that is the first thing you want to say to me Theodore Lupin she said practically yelling at him a glare on her face. She was so furious with him she couldn’t even begin where to start.

Tori started pacing back and forth. She had anger built up inside of her that she had never could process until now. She hadn’t seen Teddy since he left her here to go roam the country and then got a letter saying things wouldn’t work out. A bloody letter. Who did that? A coward that was who. She looked at him like she was about to say something then stopped and started pacing again her hands flailing up and down. She had no words to express how anger she was at this man and yet at the same time she wanted to kiss him. The thought made her stop in her tracks. She hadn’t thought of that in a long time but sometimes it did come up. She looked up at Teddy and he looked the same as ever. That stupid ass goofy grin on his face. Sometimes she just wanted to smack that off him. How could you she finally said defeated in her anger.


Words: 432
Tagged: Theodore Remus Lupin

[Theodore Remus Lupin]

Ted wasn’t sure exactly how to handle the silence between them from the time their eyes first met to the time she finished putting his arm in a sling. He knew he was about to do something terribly stupid and insane – whatever words were preparing to come out of his mouth were, he didn’t know, but he knew they were coming. It was somewhere between his desire to talk to her again, to finally get to talk about everything that happened, and also his nervousness around this woman. Growing up around her had made it easy to get used to the fact that she was part veela – he had learned not to let that overwhelming, stupid nervousness get to him back then – but now he wondered if it was just nerves or if he had once again fallen under a spell neither of them could control.

As soon as he spoke he adverted his eyes and his playful grin faded – he knew it was going to be something stupid he would say. The both of them knew that even if she had given him instructions, he would have disregarded almost all of them as soon as he left this exam room. She was trying to get out of here, trying not to do this right now – and he couldn’t entirely blame her, he halfway wanted to do the same thing; but something in his brain just wouldn’t let that happen. It was like now that he had finally seen her again, he didn’t want to see her go just yet.

After all these years that is the first thing you want to say to me Theodore Lupin

Victorie practically screamed at him, as she started to pace around the exam room, waving he arms up and down and seeming as though she didn’t know what else she could say. Hell, what else was there for her to say? Teddy was sure there was a lot – the last correspondence between the two of them had been letters – the one where she told him she was pregnant and marrying Michael had been the last he had received from her, though he had more or less told her when she first went out with him that he hoped she would be happy and stopped writing for the most part– ending things between them in the most unofficial way possible, simply to try and avoid the hurt of seeing her happy with someone else because he had been away too long.

How could you she finally said defeated in her anger.

When he had entered the exam room he had looked very much himself – but the himself of ten or fifteen years ago – his hair had been brighter, bits of teal throughout the dark brown, and he definitely didn’t appear to be the forty one years old he actually is. But in response to the stress of seeing how much he upset Victorie his appearance had shifted out of his control, now his hair a bit more faded, the natural bits of grey seeping in where it had been teal before, small wrinkles at the corners of his eyes more noticeable and deep scar along the forearm of his uninjured arm and along his neck becoming visible once again as well.

You could always tell when something made Ted feel vulnerable, or weak – his control over being a metamophagus is gone and his appearance is true for a time – a rare occurrence, sometimes even Teddy forgets what he really looks like. He thought about her words for a moment and finally looked up, ”Where do you want me to start? he asked her softly. ”With the fact that I should have come home and found a way to make our lives work and still travel? Or the part where I never came back because I didn’t want to see you with him…” Teddy figured at this point, there was no reason to keep circling around what they really needed to talk about.

Overall Teddy knew he had been selfish as a teenager and young adult and he knew that. All Victorie had wanted was for him to come home – and he hadn’t been ready to go back just yet – there were still so many places he wanted to see, creatures he wanted to study – so he had told her he needed a little more time, but promised he would come home. Another year or so later was when she told him she just wouldn’t wait for him anymore – it wasn’t long after that the Teddy had stopped writing. Then, when he had almost convinced himself he was ready to go home, she had written to him about being pregnant, about getting married – most everyone else had already stopped writing to him – so he cut one last tie and stopped writing home all together, with no intentions to come home to see her with someone else.

His blue eyes caught hers and he kept his gaze there – hoping she could see that he was hurting about all of this too. It wasn’t only her who had been hurt in the situation – he had waited too long and he lost her. That was something he had never gotten over, he had never considered being with someone else until after she told him she was getting married – and even then he couldn’t commit to any relationship – even after over twenty years apart, his heart still belonged to her.

[Victorie Arianne Beckett]

Sometimes when she was upset she couldn’t speak. That was what happened during the exam. She couldn’t even figure out what made Teddy think it was a good idea to even say something stupid to her but he did. Of course, because of how she was feeling she just snapped back. That was one thing Tori needed to work on was how she reacted to somethings that she said to others. He then asked her a few simple questions. ”Where do you want me to start? ”With the fact that I should have come home and found a way to make our lives work and still travel? Or the part where I never came back because I didn’t want to see you with him…”

Tori looked down. He had some good points but she would never had been with Michael if he had come home. Michael also was there for her in a dark time, when something happened that Tori never told Teddy about that she should have. She thought of telling him that she was pregnant when she first found it. She had written the letter out but she never sent it. She figured that it wouldn’t be fair to make him come home for a child when he didn’t want to be with her. I was pregnant Teddy before. Before I met Michael I was pregnant with your child and then I lost the baby. Michael was just someone who was being a friend at first when I was treating him as a patient and had an emotional breakdown because I went back to work too soon. Things clicked between because he was here, he was here for me when I needed him. He didn’t run off when life got too hard she said to him tears streaming down her face.

She turned away from him the letter she had written him still in her pocket. She took it out and held onto it. She didn’t know how to deal with all of this anymore and it was killing her inside to remember such a dark time. Michael wasn’t here anymore and Teddy would just up and leave. It was his style after all. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breathes trying to get herself under control. This wasn’t her, but wasn’t that the same thing she said that day she fell apart in front of Michael. She clutched the letter to her chest and fell to her knees the tears falling faster. Everything was fine….everything was okay. I was getting over Michael. I could work and I wasn’t an emotional mess. How can you still do this to me? It’s not fair she said still with her back to him. She was crying so hard her shoulders shook. It just wasn’t fair anymore.



Words: 470
Tagged: Theodore Remus Lupin

[Theodore Remus Lupin]

It was an incredibly difficult set of emotions that Ted was dealing with at the moment – the love he still had for Victorie, the disappointment in knowing he had given up his chance to be with her and the confusion on how to handle this situation. He couldn’t look at her for a long moment, thinking about her words, before he had finally answered with a couple of simple questions – though they were ones he wasn’t entirely sure he even had the answers to. Why hadn’t he come home originally?

It just felt too soon – there was so much for him to learn and see and his young mind with an ever-so-short attention span couldn’t stay in one place for long. The second part he practically answered for himself, he couldn’t ever bring himself to come home after that because he couldn’t bear to see her with anyone else – it just hurt too much, even to think about it. So he had stayed away – but now he was back home and he wanted so badly to try and make things right between them – but where was he even supposed to begin to do that?

After he had spoken, Victorie was quiet for a moment – as though deciding whether or not she should say what she was about to say. When she finally opened up to him, it was like a bomb was dropped on him – she couldn’t be serious, could she? Why wouldn’t she have written to him about this? Had he never gotten the letter? Had he known, he would have been home in a heartbeat, he would have done anything for her – especially when she needed it most; but he in the end, he still hadn’t done that much. He had stayed away longer than he had originally said – and he had asked her for more time – but he never meant for her to think that meant he didn’t love her.

I was pregnant Teddy before. Before I met Michael I was pregnant with your child and then I lost the baby. Michael was just someone who was being a friend at first when I was treating him as a patient and had an emotional breakdown because I went back to work too soon. Things clicked between because he was here, he was here for me when I needed him. He didn’t run off when life got too hard she said to him tears streaming down her face.

Teddy watched as she broke down into tears, turning away from him, clutching a letter she had pulled from her pocket. ”Why didn’t you ever tell me?” he asked her softly, having a hard time taking in everything she had just told him. ”I would’ve come home… I would’ve been there for you…” It was the last thing he had ever expected her to say – he tried to think back – she must have gotten pregnant when he had visited over the Christmas holidays that year, about six months into his travels and the last time he had been home before returning to take the job at Hogwarts.

Though she had her back to him, he could hear the tears in her voice and it broke his heart all over again to hear it. Now more than ever he was regretting asking her for more time to live his nomadic life – things could have been entirely different if he had just come home. Not that he would ever give up his two sons, but he absolutely hated that he had been so selfish in his younger years. She fell to her knees, her shoulders shaking with how hard she was crying and without turning to look at him she spoke again.

Everything was fine….everything was okay. I was getting over Michael. I could work and I wasn’t an emotional mess. How can you still do this to me? It’s not fair she said still with her back to him

Teddy got down off the exam table and walked around to where he would be facing her and he knelt down in front of her, and with his uninjured arm reached out, cupping her chin in his fingers, bringing her gaze to meet his, which now fought back tears from seeing her like this, from feeling the pain of losing her all over again, from his anger at his younger self. ”I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to do this to us… to you…” he said softly, and then he ran his fingers across her cheek and wiped away some of her tears.

In this moment, Teddy was still uncertain of whether or not this was even remotely close to the right way to handle this – it was written all over his face as he looked at her, holding back tears, he looked older, more tired and worn than he had in years and far from the confident man he had always been. This was more than he had ever expected to come back to – and he had never been good at handling emotional situations like this – but he had to at least try to be there for Torie this time around, if she would even let him.

After he wiped away some of her tears, he wrapped his arm around her and embraced her like he had wanted to do again for so many years – shifting his injured shoulder some so he could pull her head to his chest, allowing her to continue to cry – and at least at first she didn’t fight it – perhaps she was in shock still too, or maybe she had missed that feeling of closeness as much as he had. He leaned his head closer to hers, and whispered softly, ”I’m sorry…” once more, and finally a tear or two escaped him, rolling down his cheek and he wanted so badly to tell her that he had never stopped loving her – but he couldn’t bring himself to say it, for fear she wouldn’t be able to say it back.

[Victorie Arianne Beckett]

Tori had completely given up on ever being with Teddy. Once she gotten over that she could be with Michael fully. She had never gotten over losing their child though. She didn’t carry their child long but it had become part of her. She remembered when she found out she was pregnant and wrote the letter to Teddy. She also remembered not sending it because she wanted to see if he would come home for her and not because she was pregnant. She had decided that if he didn’t she would raise the child herself but then a dark day came and she ended up in Mungos losing the child. It had been hard for her and the worst part was that Teddy still hadn’t come back. He didn’t want to be with her and now he would never know about this child they almost had.

Until now. She was still in the floor when she heard his voice. ”Why didn’t you ever tell me?” ”I would’ve come home… I would’ve been there for you…” How could he be so stupid. That was not how she wanted him to come home, not because she forced him to, not before he was ready. She wanted him home because he wanted to be home, to be with her. He just didn’t get it. Her crying continued and she knew she looked horrible, oh why did she look horrible in front of Theodore. After all this time, she still worried about how she looked in front of him.

She heard him get off the table and she heard his feet moving. He was leaving, again. He couldn’t handle all this so he was leaving again. That was fine. She didn’t need him there anyway. She would be fine without him. Then he surprised her. He knelt and took her face in one hand making her look at him. Her tear stained eyes meeting his. He was still there. ”I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to do this to us… to you…” Was all she heard as he gently wiped away some of her tears. She wasn’t used to this anymore; she wasn’t used to Teddy being there. She leaned her face into his hand and then was slowly moving towards his chest thanks to him. Her head laying on his chest she breathed in his familiar scent. She closed her eyes as she stayed like that tears still falling down her face. I’m sorry Came from Teddy again and she sighed a little.

She had no idea what to do now. She was still angry but she missed this, she missed them. This felt so good to her and she didn’t want to give it up just yet. I had just found out the gender before I lost the baby. It was a girl. I had thought of naming her after your mother for you but I didn’t know if you still wanted to be with me or not; or if you still loved me. You never came back so when I lost the baby I tried to go back to my normal life. I didn’t want you to come back because I was pregnant. I wanted you to come back for me and you didn’t Teddy. I know I ended up with someone else but that was because I couldn’t wait for you anymore. I had to put my feelings aside for you and learn to love someone who was here for me when I needed him. He was only a friend at first, someone I could talk to and it just grew from there she said not knowing how he would react. She didn’t want to scare him off again but she had to tell him the exact truth. She tried to tell him in her letter about Michael the truth but the baby never came up.

She still had the letter she wrote about their child in her hand. She pulled it out of its hiding spot and handed it to him. That was the letter I almost sent saying I was pregnant. I couldn’t send it knowing you would only come home because I was pregnant. I didn’t want you somewhere you didn’t want to be Teddy. I couldn’t do that to you she said as she raised up. She had no idea how they were going to move forward. She guessed they could be friends if he wanted. Friends was good. She still loved him and her heart ached for him. How could she be friends with someone she was still in love with?



Words: 767
Tagged: Theodore Remus Lupin

[Theodore Remus Lupin]

As Ted walked over to her and knelt down, he had not known how she was going to react – but she allowed him to speak, to wipe her tears away, to pull her close – her head over his heart, where she belonged, in his opinion. He kept his arm around her in what he hoped was a tight and comforting embrace as she cried – and he apologized again – still trying to figure out why she wouldn’t have told him something this important, so long ago.

The feelings of anger toward his youthful decisions simply wouldn’t go away now – he had known he was pushing it with her – he had even thought about surprising her with a visit, but every time he made the plan he would get a call about something he was needed on, and because of his traveling lifestyle he really needed the money (especially if he wanted to give Victorie the wedding she deserved once he returned), so he would put off his visit until the day he got the letter from her about Michael. At that point, he had figured she wouldn’t even want to see him – and from that point on he had been sort of lost, even now.

I had just found out the gender before I lost the baby. It was a girl. I had thought of naming her after your mother for you but I didn’t know if you still wanted to be with me or not; or if you still loved me. You never came back so when I lost the baby I tried to go back to my normal life. I didn’t want you to come back because I was pregnant. I wanted you to come back for me and you didn’t Teddy. I know I ended up with someone else but that was because I couldn’t wait for you anymore. I had to put my feelings aside for you and learn to love someone who was here for me when I needed him. He was only a friend at first, someone I could talk to and it just grew from there she said.

As Victorie opened up to him, something he had never expected after the way things were left unfinished, unsaid, he simply didn’t have the words for how he felt. He kept her close to him as long as she would stay – not wanting that feeling of closeness to end. It had been so many years, and so much had changed – and yet this felt the same as it always had, at least to him. It felt right, her warm breath on his chest – his heart starting to race in his chest, a mixture of excitement and nerves – was this really all happening?

That was the letter I almost sent saying I was pregnant. I couldn’t send it knowing you would only come home because I was pregnant. I didn’t want you somewhere you didn’t want to be Teddy. I couldn’t do that to you she said as she raised up.

This whole situation felt surreal to him – like it was some sort of crazy dream – was he sure he hadn’t passed out from blood loss before getting here – perhaps all of this was some crazy illusion in his head. However, holding her there, for the first time in so many years, after having dreamt about it before, he knew this was no dream, no illusion, and no trick of the mind. After she spoke again, she handed him the letter – he finally understood why she hadn’t wanted to tell him. Through his travels he had forgotten to make sure she knew that he still loved her – and she thought he hadn’t wanted to be with her.

Teddy had taken the letter from her with the hand on his injured arm – and as she pulled away finally his other arm slowly fell to his side; he looked at the letter for a moment, then back up to her as he stood once again. ”I really never meant for this…” he eventually said, looking back down at the letter and away from her. ”I was selfish – I didn’t want to come home because I couldn’t do the things I wanted for you. Like afford the wedding you deserved, or a place for us to live even… I thought if I had a little bit more time, I could make it happen.” It had been so long since he had thought about any of this – and now there were even heavier feelings mixed in because she had held something back from him so many years ago that he wished he had known about.

”Then when you told me about him,” Teddy stopped for a second – he had never referenced Michael by name, and hardly spoke of his life before traveling with anyone before coming back to England. He knew however, that Michael had been an important part of Victorie’s life while he was away, and he wouldn’t try to belittle the role he had played for her. ”When you told me about Michael,” he started over, looking at her this time, ”I knew I had messed up… Then I finally decided that I would come back, but I got your letter about having a baby with him and… I just couldn’t think about it. I waited for you that whole time… I had just wanted to know that I could give you everything you deserved before we got married… I took too long.”

It was hard for him to tell her all of this – but she had been completely fair and open and honest with him and now he owed it to her to do the same. The worst part was, if he had just communicated with her better, come back to visit between jobs, even for an hour, things could have been entirely different; but as a young-adult all he could think of was he wasn’t good enough for her yet. How could they get married if they couldn’t even afford rent? He had left to gain experience, to earn money and to hopefully find a career outside the ministry – and he had managed all that – but at the cost of losing the one person his heart still ached for.

”I stayed away because I still love you, Torie…” he finally admitted. ”I couldn’t think about you with someone else… Even when I tried, I never stopped loving you.”

[Victorie Arianne Beckett]

Teddy was holding her close and wiping away tears as she sat down there and he put his head over her heart. This couldn’t feel more right which is why she felt the need to tell him more about their baby, about what had happened, and why she had sought comfort in Michael. She opened to him and he listened her tears continued falling down her face as she talked. When she handed him the letter she turned away so he couldn’t see the tears that kept falling. He had watched her cry enough. She had put him through too much already in one day he was probably furious with her.

After handing him the letter and getting up Tori was pacing. She had no idea how Teddy would react to all of this. She still loved him and cared for him deeply. All these years she had only wanted him. Michael knew how she felt and he had been okay with it, he knew that Tori had loved him as well not as much as she loved Teddy but she had still loved him. Already she was missing Teddy’s arms around her. She listened to him and frowned after a while. Teddy I didn’t need all those things. All I needed was you here with me she told him.

The way Teddy said him sent a cold chill down her spine. She didn’t interrupt him though and Teddy corrected himself and said his name, Michael. She knew it couldn’t have been easy for him. She let him finished and what he said crushed her. It made her feel like she was the worst person on the earth. He had waited for her and she had gone and sought comfort in someone else after their, her and Teddy’s, baby had died inside of her when the person she should have been talking with had still been miles away. It was her fault that he was that far away as well. She didn’t tell him about the baby. He would have come back to her when she told him about the baby but no she had her pride and look where it got her. Yes, she had a great life with Michael and some amazing kids but her life with Teddy was sacrificed.

She turned back to him when he told her that he still loved her and that he never stopped loving her. Tears were still in her eyes and she smiled at him. I love you to Teddy. I never stopped either. Most of me still loved you even with Michael…he knew that. It was hard to believe that he loved me as much as he did. I did love him to an extent but he knew my heart belonged to someone else…. stayed with someone else she said. She wiped the tears from her eyes. I must get back to work but I do want to see you again Teddy…come find me some time okay she said and she walked out of his exam room.



Words: 507
Tagged: Theodore Remus Lupin